Cracks in the Cement
by Kate Anderson
Summary: Is this what you want?


Title: Cracks in the Cement  
  
Author: Kate Anderson  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters  
  
**  
  
It was Maria's tangled hair across the pillow. Her soft scent that he could smell on the sheets.  
  
"Is this what you want?" she asked, her voice muffled due to her mouth being partially buried in the pillow.  
  
Jack lay on his back, drumming his fingers on his chest. Counting the - what were they? - plaster bumps on the ceiling. "Is this what you want?" He threw the question back at her.  
  
"It's what the girls want."  
  
He was at two hundred now. Surprised that his cluttered mind could count that high. "I need some time, Maria. I need to think a few things over."  
  
He stood up, taking the duvet with him.  
  
~*~  
  
The cement steps were cold. Samantha looked at them, examining the cracks and chips, wondering what had happened to cause them. All the feet that had passed over them.  
  
She crossed her hands at the wrist and let them dangle. She knew that she could wait inside - Jack still had a key - but she liked watching him arrive. Her heart fluttering with anticipation as he walked toward her.  
  
Her head lifted each time movement caught her eye. Each time she realized that it wasn't Jack, she let out an involuntary sigh and let her head fall back down.  
  
The cold was making her leg ache. Samantha gritted her teeth and tried to think warm thoughts. Palm trees, sandy beach, two towels - though she couldn't quite picture Jack on the beach.  
  
A smile graced her lips as she caught sight of his familiar movement. His sloping gait. Even from this distance, she could see that he was smiling as well.  
  
"Hey," he said as he drew closer. "I wasn't expecting a welcoming party."  
  
She shrugged in what she hoped was nonchalant manner. "I thought I'd get outside for a while. Get some fresh air."  
  
A truck drove by, pumping diesel exhaust into the air.   
  
"Do you need some help up?" Jack asked, holding out a hand.  
  
"Thank you," Samantha said and grasped his hand. She didn't need any help.   
  
He let her lean against him and together they stepped inside the building.  
  
~*~  
  
"What's this about, Jack? You call me up, tell me that you need to see me. Is something going on?"  
  
Jack's fingers curved around his mug of coffee. He inhaled the warm steam rising from it, feeling it tickle his nostrils. "I had a talk with Maria this morning."  
  
To most people, a few words would not constitute a talk but to Jack, it was the longest conversation in the history of conversation.  
  
Samantha wasn't sure how to respond. "Oh." seemed like a good reply.  
  
"She wanted to know if this is what I want."  
  
"This?" Samantha asked, waving her hand about the quiet apartment.  
  
"To be together with her. Our marriage."  
  
"Oh." again seemed to be the appropriate response. Samantha's mug had tiny cracks on it. Little squiggly lines that looked like pencil marks. She rubbed at them but they didn't come off.  
  
"I told her that I needed to think about it."  
  
"And that's why you called me. To help you think about it?"  
  
Jack shrugged and put his mug down on top of a magazine. How to tell if your spouse is cheating on you. He ran his hand, still warm from the mug, over his face. It was too bad that he had taken his razor out of Samantha's apartment - he needed a shave.  
  
"What's there to think about?" Samantha asked. "It's over, like you said."  
  
Jack nodded. "I know, I just wanted to..." His voice trailed off. Samantha rubbed at the cracks again, concentrating on them and not the pained expression on Jack's face.  
  
"Have one last fling? One more ride before you give yourself back to her, body and soul?"  
  
She caught herself by surprise with the bitterness behind her words. The coffee in her mug was rippling, a minor earthquake caused by her trembling hands.  
  
"I'm sorry." she said.  
  
"I'm not sure I would have put it as eloquently as you just did," Jack said, his voice tinged with amusement.   
  
"No." Samantha said, again surprised by her voice. She had expected it to be trembling like her hands.  
  
"No, I wouldn't have put it as eloquently or no..."  
  
"No."  
  
Jack picked up his mug. Twenty sure signs to let you know if he's faithful. He took a sip of the bitter liquid. "That's all I needed to know." he said.  
  
Samantha's leg was throbbing. Beach, blankets, Jack's pale skin glowing in the bright sunshine. "Go home, Jack." she said and forced herself to smile.  
  
He stood up, leaving a Jack-shaped dent in the sofa. His lips brushed her forehead and his fingers lingered on her shoulder. "I can let myself out." he whispered.  
  
Samantha nodded. She didn't watch him leave - she didn't like watching him leave. She imagined Jack's feet passing over the stairs, wearing down the cement.  
  
Just as he done so many times before. 


End file.
